By: Pastor Joshua Gwara Omolo, Kenya, Africa
Definition of social life
Three words are important here; Society, social life and relationship. A society is a group of
people that have common factors of life, and are therefore able to, not only co-exist, but also to
live together. The predominant factor of life they share here being culture. The fact that they
share the same culture empowers them to live in harmony in almost every aspect of life. That is
society. Many pastors are living in loneliness detached from the society and unable to feel the
Social life around them hence the reason All propastors international is addressing this
challenge by encouraging pastors to form champions table where they can defeat loneliness;
this is meant to empower them to master the individual’s manner of integration into the
society. Every man needs to understand and create an inbuilt capacity to correlate with each
member of the society and experience mutual benefit from the relationship
The perfect Relationship
Relationship on the other hand can be defined as, “the way in which two or more people or
groups regard and behave towards each other, and it is the state of being connected. God
never intended that any man should live in silos as it is the norm in many societies today
especially in the cities around the world. The book of psalm 133 clearly demonstrates the divine
benefits that can be achieved when people live together in unity, God pours his unprecedented
blessings in such kind of a fellowship beyond anyone’s’ imagination Allow me to say at this
point that the vast majority of the human population today is faced with the big problem of
broken relationship not only with fellow men but also with God the creator of Heaven and the
Earth.
The society we are living in today has become largely dysfunctional due to multiple systemic
failures which can be attributed to the broken relationship between man and God. When God
created the first man Adam he said it is not good for man to be alone then Eve was created to
complement and social life of Adam in order to solve the challenge of loneliness by providing an
effective companionship and to enable them to reproduce
Every level of relationship in life has a specific mutual benefit which should be realized by both
parties involved. The intention of God the author of the perfect relationship was to empower
mankind to develop an effective social life which is also dependent on God’s divine
supernatural relation with Him God the father. Many failures in the life of mankind today can be directly or indirectly attributed to the broken relationship between man and God; it is for
this reason that Jesus the son of God came and died on the cross in order to restore back the
original relationship between man and God. Jesus died for us to show God’s greatest love for
mankind and to restore our relationship with Him (John 15:13). In Jesus, God has shown us how
much He loves us, even while we are still sinners. In Christ we are assured of His constant love
that will never fail; this is the solid foundation for our relationship with God
Four Steps to Redeem our Relationship with God
- Receive the Gift of God who is Jesus
Our spiritual birth is the perfect point of mending our relationship with God the father (John
3:3-8). We need to believe in our heart that Jesus son of God died on the cross for our sins and
on the third day he resurrected from the dead, then confess with our mouth that Jesus is our
lord then we receive salvation immediately (Romans 10:9-10). Our restored relationship with
God is the beginning of our ongoing transformation into Christ likeness (2Cor 5:17). The perfect
relationship with God leads to perfect relationship with men.
Only God can redefine our dysfunctional relationships in the society today. Embracing other
items in an attempt to fill the void of the broken relationship cannot suffice at all. Many people
have chosen to fellowship with gadgets instead of fellow men, but still the void of loneliness
remains. God is the author of perfect relationship and we must admit that He is the only one
who can restore this broken relationship.
Many other things like pets too cannot substitute the place of effective relationship with fellow
men. There is nothing wrong keeping these animals but God’s original plan was for men to
relate with fellow men in accordance to the Patten and guidelines given by the scriptures in the
Bible. The ultimate goal in the whole mix of relationship is to establish eternal relationship with
God, relationship that knows no barrier so much so that even death cannot conquer it.
Definition of social life
Social life is a relational ability with fellow man. Healthy social life is the ability to build a
healthy relationship with fellow man. You build the kind of relationship that enhances the well-
being of each party involved. Your relationship with fellow man is built in such a way that each
party involved draws optimal destiny benefits. It is a relationship that enhances mutual benefit
for everyone involved. That is a healthy relationship.
Not all relationships carry mutual benefit. Many relationships we form with fellow men are
platforms of being used, in the end, only the user benefits. Some are platforms of being abused.
Abuse is abnormal use. And at times the relationships are platforms on which people use us for very wrong things. You meet a house wife whose husband has turned her into a punching bag.
That is abuse. And that is not a healthy relationship.
Giving as a building block towards a healthy relationship
God has provided a very elaborate and well detailed protocol on how to engage and build a
healthy relationship through the principle of giving. The culture of giving is the master key to
almost every success. One story share by all those deemed to be successful in the world today
and this cuts across the divide is giving.
Offer your body as a living sacrifice holy and pleasing unto God. This is your spiritual act of
worship. Do not conform any longer to the patterns of this world, but be transformed by the
renewing of your mind (Romans 12:1). Since our bodies are the temple of the Holy Spirit, God is
placing this non-negotiable terms and condition that His friends must surrender their bodies to
be owned and utilized for worship. Holiness is the act of individuals decision to separate
him/her self from any form of sinful indulgence, it is a choice deliberately made by the man of
faith to honor God with his body. The man of faith must learn to live according to the covenant
of the word. Failure to take this action of living a life full of sanctity is what is referred to
engaging in the patterns of the world. The world has its own culture and ways of doing thing.
Quiet often, the patterns of the worldly life is offensive to God because they are contrary to the
kingdom principles of living right with God.
The word of God says it more blessed to give than to receive. Acts 20:35 – In everything I did, I
showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the word of the
Lord Jesus himself said; “It is more blessed to give than to receive.” But the hard reality today is
that the culture of giving is diminishing by the day in every culture.
America became a great Nation based on the platform of giving, but the culture is diminishing
each and every day and no wonder some other the Tigger nations are emerging with such a
great challenge to the economy of the USA. The newly formed BRICS alliance has but one
agenda to sideline the US Dollar in order to bring down the US economy.
The great funding for missionary works that used to flow from America to Africa has reduced
significantly and the many churches activities in the outreach ministries in African has also
reduced marginally, seminary colleges that used to sponsor theology courses are turning into
commercial training institutions in order to remain a float. The Bible is saying that we should
not grow tired in doing good because it will soon flow back to us (Ecclesiastes 11:1 – cast thy
bread in many waters: for thou shall find it after many days)
All these changes are sponsored by the new emerging trend of the culture of materialism
where people would want to be defined by the wealth they own instead of the God they
worship, hence this has broaden the gap between the rich and the poor. Many economies in
African countries today project a grim picture of inequality; a quick profile of a society where
1% of the population owns the 99% of the wealth in the land while the 99% population are left
to survive on 1% of the wealth in the country, what a big shame and what a negative contrast.
Healthy relationship can never exist in such unequal society where majority of people die of
hunger instead of disease. A healthy relationship is a platform for sustainable peace. Peace is a
relational state of being. It is a state in which conflict has no power to access and shake your
relationship. A relationship that is attaining the state of peace manifests in conflicts being less
frequent. But the intensity of the conflict is also less and less. It takes longer to experience the
next conflict.
A healthy relationship has friendship. The Greek word ‘philos’ from which we obtain the word
‘friend’ means associate.
Friendship as a building block towards a perfect relationship
A friend is someone you associate with. When couples are friends, they tend to always
associate with each other. They keep each other’s company. Not only do you associate
physically, you also do so internally. You easily divulge the secrets of your hearts to each other.
The purpose of champion’s table initiative by the All propastors international (APPI) is to enable
pastors to embrace this intimate level of fellowship of sharing the burdens with one another
just the way Jesus did with Peter, James and John. Learning to be compassionate and caring; is
quite a challenge but its rewarding.
This is what we see in John 15:15-16. In the beginning of this Scripture our Lord Jesus
announces to his disciples that he is the true vine and they are the branches. Then he speaks of
the need for the branches to abide in the vine. In vs 13 he says, “Greater love has no-one than
this, that he lay down his life for his friends” Then in this portion of scripture, he says,
I no-longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead I
have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my father I have made known to you.
You did not chose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit”
Abraham became a friend of God and he was accounted as righteous in the eyes of God. The
tag of friendship comes along with unmatched favor that opens many doors in life. Our Gog the
father of our Lord Jesus Christ is very much alive to this kingdom principle of friendship. And the
scripture was fulfilled which says, “Abraham believed God, and it was accounted to him for
righteousness.” And he was called the friend of God (James 2:21=23). There are many gates
that God is will open in your life if only you cultivate and appreciate this kingdom principle. The
friendship pillar requires one to be sensitive of the need of the other party.
Friends will be careful not to venture into areas that can easily offend their counterparts.
Friendship requires serious investment of quality time and support; using every relevant
material that can add value to ensure that it remains sustainable. God is calling for effective
worship done in truth and in the spirit. You don’t need to be perfect to engage friendship with
God; God is the one who will make you perfect through sanctification. God does not call the
qualified but he qualifies the called ones and you can be a part of the called ones only by having
faith in God as earlier mentioned.
Affirmation as a building block towards effective relationship
True friends celebrate one another whenever there is achievement. Acknowledging the
strength in your friend is a key to winning confidence of that friend. Affirmation is one of the
good mannerisms in building friendship in a relationship that can stand the test of time.
Celebrate your fellow pastor by pointing out to him the area of his strength even as you
cultivate friendship in you champion’s table. Spouse need to learn to acknowledge the strength
in their partners and that will remain as a pillar of trust in their holy matrimony. Leaders need
to learn how to commend their followers in the areas where their performance has exceeded
expectation.
Many parents have lost control of their children simply because they have never affirmed the
strength in their sons and daughters. In Mathew 3:17 – And a voice from heaven said, “This is
my beloved son, in whom I am well pleased” This was a land mark statement loud enough to
erase any fear of doubt or contradiction about the identity of Jesus and his relationship with
God the father. God himself spoke expressly without using any messenger to send a very strong
message to the world that Jesus is the son of God and that God id well pleased with him. Our
sons and daughters are in need of similar affirmation for them to manifest and project their
strength effective in their generation.
Every man on the planet is born with a special talent and unique gifting. The challenge we have
in the society is that people are trying to compare and compete with each other instead of
complementing one another. Often many people have been broken and their self-esteem
destroyed because this same mistake of unhealthy competition. God’s plan was to ensure that
his strength is revealed in our weakness and this is the reason why we need to learn on how
depend on God at all times. Spouses can only walk the long journey of marriage successfully
when they learn to discover and appreciate the strength in their partners. The culture of blame
game and finger pointing which is common in many marriages is one of the main factors that
have led to collapse in many marriage institutions.
Effective communication as a building block towards healthy relationship
Dialogue is a key factor in enhancing effective relationship because dispute and disagreement is
bound to occur where there are two or more people. Proper communication channels and
communication tools must be put in place to facilitate this process. Effective communication
must ensure that that there is feedback as a confirmation that the message has been received
properly. The language involved must be made simple and understandable by the parties
involved, it must also be structured in a manner that is should contain elements of respect to
the consumer or receiver. Some of the other extraneous factors that can hinder effective
communication may include environmental stress factor like illiteracy, hunger, diseases,
insecurity and uncontrolled external information.
Jesus warned his disciples to be weary of the dangers the disciples were to encounter. In
Mathew 10:16 – Behold, I am sending you out like sheep among wolves; therefore be as
shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves. The message here was to prepare the disciples
psychologically so that they can be made ready for tough times ahead; it also contains
measures that the disciples were to apply in order to overcome the difficult situations they
were to encounter. The symbols used in the message (sheep, wolf, dove and snake) are to
create a clear and simple understanding of the hostility that would come their way.
The world around us is today has become more hostile to the people of God and the situation is
not going to get any better. The anti-Christ movements are now come out in the open to
declare that they do not want God. We believers must therefore come alive to this fact that we
need to engage the strategies of communications that were shared by Christ himself. We must
begin by establishing clear channels of communications in our households then escalate it to
the outer most parts of the world.
A good communicator must also learn first to be a good listener. Failure to listen to the
feedback can destroy a relationship. Believers often find themselves in this league where we
only want to speak to God all our thoughts and once we are done then we leave God’s presence
thinking that we are done with our prayers. Effective prayers must include listening to what
God is telling with regards to the petitions made before him. God is the one to determine the
final answer to our petitions hence the need to want to hear from Him. Parents must learn to
listen to their kids. The habit of treating kids like they must only follow what they have been
told to do without being given an opportunity to share their take is an outdated approach is
positive parenting.
- Admit that we are sinners
The first step to restoration of the perfect relationship between men and Go is to admit that
the life we are living is headed in the wrong direction. We must accept responsibility because of
the bad choices we keep on making on daily basis. In the book of Luke 15:11-17, the prodigal
son made a choice to detach himself from the father; we need to acknowledge the sins that
separates us from God the father (Romans 3:23) and its penalty of death. But for many of us it
is very difficult to come to this conclusion of admitting our sins, and we tend to hide or blame
others for our sins as did Adam. We still try to convince ourselves that life is good even on the
face of this massive failure we can see in our society today. Admitting our mistakes like the
prodigal son is the first step to restoration of our relationship with God. - Return to God in repentance
We need to climb down from our ivory towers with a repentant, humble attitude rather than
hiding and covering (Acts 3:19; Genesis 3:10; Isaiah 59:2). Returning to God through confession
and asking for forgiveness of our sins removes the sin that blocks our relationship with Him.
When we confess our sins before God he promises to forgive us (John 1:9), and forgiveness is
what restores relationship that has been broken. The prodigal son did not just plan to get his
relationship right with his father but he practically took a step and returned back to the father.
Many people keep on with procrastination of their step to returning to God by harboring many
unnecessary excuses. God is saying in the book of 2Corinthians 6:2 – “In acceptable time I have
heard you, And in the day of salvation I have helped you,” Behold, now is the accepted time;
behold now. The prodigal son humbly acknowledged, “I am not worthy to be called your son”
(Luke 15:19). He was simply acknowledging that he did not deserve anything from the father.
This is the kind of spirit that we need to wear for us to return back to God - Recognize that God will lovingly welcome us home
No matter how far we have gone, our loving God the father of our Lord Jesus Christ welcomes
us home. There are seven things that the father does in the story of the prodigal son – looking,
running, kissing, giving clothing and ring and sandals, and throwing a feast (Luke 15:20-24).
These acts are a clear illustration of the heavenly father’s love for sinners. The story of the prodigal son gives us a clear picture of our heavenly father who is always ready to forgive all sins no matter how deep they may seem to be. In Isaiah 1:8 – God says, “Come now, let us
reason together,” says the Lord though your sin are like scarlet, they will be as white as snow.
He is a compassionate and loving father who runs towards us to give us a hug. Let us embrace
this unmatched love. Let each one of us consider this outpouring love of God so that we may
receive of His great salvation.
- Receive the Gift of God who is Jesus
Our spiritual birth is the perfect point of mending our relationship with God the father (John
3:3-8). We need to believe in our heart that Jesus son of God died on the cross for our sins and
on the third day he resurrected from the dead, then confess with our mouth that Jesus is our
lord then we receive salvation immediately (Romans 10:9-10). Our restored relationship with
God is the beginning of our ongoing transformation into Christ likeness (2Cor 5:17). The perfect
relationship with God leads to perfect relationship with men.
Only God can redefine our dysfunctional relationships in the society today. Embracing other
items in an attempt to fill the void of the broken relationship cannot suffice at all. Many people
have chosen to fellowship with gadgets instead of fellow men, but still the void of loneliness
remains. God is the author of perfect relationship and we must admit that He is the only one
who can restore this broken relationship.
Many other things like pets too cannot substitute the place of effective relationship with fellow
men. There is nothing wrong keeping these animals but God’s original plan was for men to
relate with fellow men in accordance to the Patten and guidelines given by the scriptures in the
Bible. The ultimate goal in the whole mix of relationship is to establish eternal relationship with
God, relationship that knows no barrier so much so that even death cannot conquer it.
Definition of social life
Social life is a relational ability with fellow man. Healthy social life is the ability to build a
healthy relationship with fellow man. You build the kind of relationship that enhances the well-
being of each party involved. Your relationship with fellow man is built in such a way that each
party involved draws optimal destiny benefits. It is a relationship that enhances mutual benefit
for everyone involved. That is a healthy relationship.
Not all relationships carry mutual benefit. Many relationships we form with fellow men are
platforms of being used, in the end, only the user benefits. Some are platforms of being abused.
Abuse is abnormal use. And at times the relationships are platforms on which people use us for very wrong things. You meet a house wife whose husband has turned her into a punching bag.
That is abuse. And that is not a healthy relationship.
Giving as a building block towards a healthy relationship
God has provided a very elaborate and well detailed protocol on how to engage and build a
healthy relationship through the principle of giving. The culture of giving is the master key to
almost every success. One story share by all those deemed to be successful in the world today
and this cuts across the divide is giving.
Offer your body as a living sacrifice holy and pleasing unto God. This is your spiritual act of
worship. Do not conform any longer to the patterns of this world, but be transformed by the
renewing of your mind (Romans 12:1). Since our bodies are the temple of the Holy Spirit, God is
placing this non-negotiable terms and condition that His friends must surrender their bodies to
be owned and utilized for worship. Holiness is the act of individuals decision to separate
him/her self from any form of sinful indulgence, it is a choice deliberately made by the man of
faith to honor God with his body. The man of faith must learn to live according to the covenant
of the word. Failure to take this action of living a life full of sanctity is what is referred to
engaging in the patterns of the world. The world has its own culture and ways of doing thing.
Quiet often, the patterns of the worldly life is offensive to God because they are contrary to the
kingdom principles of living right with God.
The word of God says it more blessed to give than to receive. Acts 20:35 – In everything I did, I
showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the word of the
Lord Jesus himself said; “It is more blessed to give than to receive.” But the hard reality today is
that the culture of giving is diminishing by the day in every culture.
America became a great Nation based on the platform of giving, but the culture is diminishing
each and every day and no wonder some other the Tigger nations are emerging with such a
great challenge to the economy of the USA. The newly formed BRICS alliance has but one
agenda to sideline the US Dollar in order to bring down the US economy.
The great funding for missionary works that used to flow from America to Africa has reduced
significantly and the many churches activities in the outreach ministries in African has also
reduced marginally, seminary colleges that used to sponsor theology courses are turning into
commercial training institutions in order to remain a float. The Bible is saying that we should
not grow tired in doing good because it will soon flow back to us (Ecclesiastes 11:1 – cast thy
bread in many waters: for thou shall find it after many days)
All these changes are sponsored by the new emerging trend of the culture of materialism
where people would want to be defined by the wealth they own instead of the God they
worship, hence this has broaden the gap between the rich and the poor. Many economies in
African countries today project a grim picture of inequality; a quick profile of a society where
1% of the population owns the 99% of the wealth in the land while the 99% population are left
to survive on 1% of the wealth in the country, what a big shame and what a negative contrast.
Healthy relationship can never exist in such unequal society where majority of people die of
hunger instead of disease. A healthy relationship is a platform for sustainable peace. Peace is a
relational state of being. It is a state in which conflict has no power to access and shake your
relationship. A relationship that is attaining the state of peace manifests in conflicts being less
frequent. But the intensity of the conflict is also less and less. It takes longer to experience the
next conflict.
A healthy relationship has friendship. The Greek word ‘philos’ from which we obtain the word
‘friend’ means associate.
Friendship as a building block towards a perfect relationship
A friend is someone you associate with. When couples are friends, they tend to always
associate with each other. They keep each other’s company. Not only do you associate
physically, you also do so internally. You easily divulge the secrets of your hearts to each other.
The purpose of champion’s table initiative by the All propastors international (APPI) is to enable
pastors to embrace this intimate level of fellowship of sharing the burdens with one another
just the way Jesus did with Peter, James and John. Learning to be compassionate and caring; is
quite a challenge but its rewarding.
This is what we see in John 15:15-16. In the beginning of this Scripture our Lord Jesus
announces to his disciples that he is the true vine and they are the branches. Then he speaks of
the need for the branches to abide in the vine. In vs 13 he says, “Greater love has no-one than
this, that he lay down his life for his friends” Then in this portion of scripture, he says,
I no-longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead I
have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my father I have made known to you.
You did not chose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit”
Abraham became a friend of God and he was accounted as righteous in the eyes of God. The
tag of friendship comes along with unmatched favor that opens many doors in life. Our Gog the
father of our Lord Jesus Christ is very much alive to this kingdom principle of friendship. And the
scripture was fulfilled which says, “Abraham believed God, and it was accounted to him for
righteousness.” And he was called the friend of God (James 2:21=23). There are many gates
that God is will open in your life if only you cultivate and appreciate this kingdom principle. The
friendship pillar requires one to be sensitive of the need of the other party.
Friends will be careful not to venture into areas that can easily offend their counterparts.
Friendship requires serious investment of quality time and support; using every relevant
material that can add value to ensure that it remains sustainable. God is calling for effective
worship done in truth and in the spirit. You don’t need to be perfect to engage friendship with
God; God is the one who will make you perfect through sanctification. God does not call the
qualified but he qualifies the called ones and you can be a part of the called ones only by having
faith in God as earlier mentioned.
Affirmation as a building block towards effective relationship
True friends celebrate one another whenever there is achievement. Acknowledging the
strength in your friend is a key to winning confidence of that friend. Affirmation is one of the
good mannerisms in building friendship in a relationship that can stand the test of time.
Celebrate your fellow pastor by pointing out to him the area of his strength even as you
cultivate friendship in you champion’s table. Spouse need to learn to acknowledge the strength
in their partners and that will remain as a pillar of trust in their holy matrimony. Leaders need
to learn how to commend their followers in the areas where their performance has exceeded
expectation.
Many parents have lost control of their children simply because they have never affirmed the
strength in their sons and daughters. In Mathew 3:17 – And a voice from heaven said, “This is
my beloved son, in whom I am well pleased” This was a land mark statement loud enough to
erase any fear of doubt or contradiction about the identity of Jesus and his relationship with
God the father. God himself spoke expressly without using any messenger to send a very strong
message to the world that Jesus is the son of God and that God id well pleased with him. Our
sons and daughters are in need of similar affirmation for them to manifest and project their
strength effective in their generation.
Every man on the planet is born with a special talent and unique gifting. The challenge we have
in the society is that people are trying to compare and compete with each other instead of
complementing one another. Often many people have been broken and their self-esteem
destroyed because this same mistake of unhealthy competition. God’s plan was to ensure that
his strength is revealed in our weakness and this is the reason why we need to learn on how
depend on God at all times. Spouses can only walk the long journey of marriage successfully
when they learn to discover and appreciate the strength in their partners. The culture of blame
game and finger pointing which is common in many marriages is one of the main factors that
have led to collapse in many marriage institutions.
Effective communication as a building block towards healthy relationship
Dialogue is a key factor in enhancing effective relationship because dispute and disagreement is
bound to occur where there are two or more people. Proper communication channels and
communication tools must be put in place to facilitate this process. Effective communication
must ensure that that there is feedback as a confirmation that the message has been received
properly. The language involved must be made simple and understandable by the parties
involved, it must also be structured in a manner that is should contain elements of respect to
the consumer or receiver. Some of the other extraneous factors that can hinder effective
communication may include environmental stress factor like illiteracy, hunger, diseases,
insecurity and uncontrolled external information.
Jesus warned his disciples to be weary of the dangers the disciples were to encounter. In
Mathew 10:16 – Behold, I am sending you out like sheep among wolves; therefore be as
shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves. The message here was to prepare the disciples
psychologically so that they can be made ready for tough times ahead; it also contains
measures that the disciples were to apply in order to overcome the difficult situations they
were to encounter. The symbols used in the message (sheep, wolf, dove and snake) are to
create a clear and simple understanding of the hostility that would come their way.
The world around us is today has become more hostile to the people of God and the situation is
not going to get any better. The anti-Christ movements are now come out in the open to
declare that they do not want God. We believers must therefore come alive to this fact that we
need to engage the strategies of communications that were shared by Christ himself. We must
begin by establishing clear channels of communications in our households then escalate it to
the outer most parts of the world.
A good communicator must also learn first to be a good listener. Failure to listen to the
feedback can destroy a relationship. Believers often find themselves in this league where we
only want to speak to God all our thoughts and once we are done then we leave God’s presence
thinking that we are done with our prayers. Effective prayers must include listening to what
God is telling with regards to the petitions made before him. God is the one to determine the
final answer to our petitions hence the need to want to hear from Him. Parents must learn to
listen to their kids. The habit of treating kids like they must only follow what they have been
told to do without being given an opportunity to share their take is an outdated approach is
positive parenting.
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